LIFE CHANGER :
By Kimberly Bozeman, MA.,LPCC
This is an interactive and transformative journal. This journal allows someone to recognize, identify, and process feelings and behaviors. One of my mottos is as follows: "Whatever you don't address, you give permission to exist!" Just because you suppress or ignore a problem does not mean that it goes away. As a matter of fact, you push it down inside of you, and it then becomes a part of you. Then, it takes up residence in every cell of your being. This is why some people may experience recurrent dreams, nightmares, and intrusive thoughts! Take my word for it; if you don't deal with it, IT will deal with you!
This journal helps you get frustration and pain out of your heart and head, and to put it onto paper! It is better out than in. One of the problems with human beings is that we do not like to be uncomfortable. I am asking you to become comfortable with getting uncomfortable! It is the healthiest way to heal. Let me introduce the acronym A.S.K.
A is for radical Acceptance. Life happens to all of us at one time or another. Things will come our way that we do not want to experience. Instead, we attempt to analyze and figure out why and how it happened. This increases stress and depression. You send messages to your sympathetic nervous system, and your adrenal glands release adrenaline and cortisol causing you to feel anxious, fearful and depressed. What we must realize is that there is absolutely nothing we can do about something that has already happened!
No matter how much worrying, crying, and regretting you do; what was will be until you accept it and decide to move forward. In other words, this is your new normal, hence radical Acceptance.
S is for Sitting with it! It is absolutely okay to sit with the pain long enough to be more accepting of the current conditions. Sitting with it to have non-judgmental thoughts and allowing what is to just be. Sitting with the anger, disappointment, frustration, etc. to be open, honest, and to validate your needs. When we sit with the uncomfortable experience, we are not suppressing but processing in a healthy way.
For example, if you were adopted, you may have questions regarding the decisions of your biological parents. Understandably, these questions can be difficult and uncomfortable. However, this journal will help you to identify and sit with the emotions of abandonment, unworthiness, betrayal, etc. It will help you to cultivate and nurture your inner child. What you must realize at this time in your life, who you need now is you! You do not want to perpetuate the abandonment or abusive cycle. You must be at home for you now! You have the power to heal yourself, but you must first sit with yourself!
K, is for Keep it moving! You have heard the saying, "Analysis is paralysis!". You have to keep it moving, but how you proceed is very important! Will you proceed weighed down with extra weight, or will you be free? This question is a matter of choice and work! If you choose to be free, that means you must put in the work. Whereas, if you choose the former, just do nothing! This journal will help you to get rid of the extra baggage or weight that impedes your emotional freedom and growth. By helping you to sort out your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors; this journal will provide better consequences, and immeasurable growth!